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Off-Topic@Heyuri
If there any little girls on Heyuri that fit the following requirements, please respond to this thread. But first, here's what I have to offer:

1. Financial stability: I make well below average in my country (Located in my mother's basement in Alabama)

2. Age: I am below 60, but above 40.

3. Attractiveness: Aggregate of various AI rating sites: 1.9/10. First person sources: Two little girls at the playground screamed and ran away saying I was a "monster"

There. Those are the important details. My "personality"? You can figure that out later :kuma6:

With that out of the way, here's who I am looking for:

1. Female, Aged 4-10

2. Located in USA

3. Cute
3.1 Not fat
3.2 White and or Asian

4. Willing to hop in my van (and maybe hit it later... jk.... but srsly, we can get to know eachother first. Something long term :wink:)
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heyuri copypasta :biggrin:
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Nice try, buddy. :lolico:
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キタ━━━(゚∀゚)━━━!!
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>>176198
are there rock CDs and beer too? :kuma6:

Off-Topic@Heyuri
PANTSU MOGIRE BEAM
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lol butt.
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キタ━━━(゚∀゚)━━━!!

Off-Topic@Heyuri
how do you treat bugs?
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hell no
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when I lived in a roach infested apartment, I noticed the young roaches specifically would crawl on me :biggrin:
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I never kill them. I always scoop them up and toss them outside, sometimes with a short prayer for them to be reincarnated as humans. I hate seeing anyone kill them so mercilessly. :cry:
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I debug and fix them on my own or I post an issue on a bugtracker :biggrin:

Off-Topic@Heyuri
File: 18.png
(1.12 MB, 2000x2500)
1175958
キタ━━━(゚∀゚)━━━!!
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File: 19.png
(1.75 MB, 2000x2500)
1837895
キタ━━━(゚∀゚)━━━!!
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gokiburu~
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キタ━━━(゚∀゚)━━━!!
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>>176168
holy shit (;゚∀゚)

2D Cute@Heyuri
キタ━━━(゚∀゚)━━━!!
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UUU~!!!
GOKIBURI~!!! :worry:

Off-Topic@Heyuri
is being retarded moe?
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Yes.
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very :biggrin:

Flash@Heyuri
キタ━━━(゚∀゚)━━━!!
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sauce?
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Toumei Ningen OVA from 2006

Off-Topic@Heyuri
This doll climbed a whole mountain all by herself. What have you done lately?
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raid underwear draws
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Then who was camera?

Off-Topic@Heyuri
キタ━━━(゚∀゚)━━━!!
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キタ━━━(゚∀゚)━━━!!
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WOOOOOOOOOO!

Off-Topic@Heyuri
If theres anyone on Heyuri that fit the following requirements, please respond to this thread. But first, here's what I have to offer:

1. Financial stability: I make well above average in my country, since i cook for only my best customers (who happen to be rich).

2. Age: I am below 25, but above 18.

3. Skills: Many of my customers described my dishes as "Tasty"

There. Those are the important details. My "personality"? You can figure that out later :happy:

With that out of the way, here's who I am looking for:

1. Any gender, 15-35

2. Not a picky eater

3. Eats healthy
3.1 Not underweight
3.2 No tattoos
3.3 Does not take drugs
3.4 preferably above average muscle

4. Willing to help me cook (and maybe be the final ingredient later... jk.... but srsly, we can get to know eachother first. Something tender enough for the both of us :wink:)
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Have I got the chef for you .. :biggrin:
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ZOMG WE WERE MADE FOR EACH OTHER LETS MEET UP ASAP

Killashandra
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i like this one
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:cry:
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:unsure:

Off-Topic@Heyuri
is this true?
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4 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
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>>176041
haha wiz-tard p0wers :xd:
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>>176041
Does that apply to a man’s rectum?
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>>176083
yes, the rectum directly consumes your wizard powers and enriches the presumably male partner
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>>176098
Not true. It does, however, turn the both of you into a bunch of faggots. :biggrin:
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>>176115
maybe if you were older you would understand

Girl Talk@Heyuri
Whenever someone shows me a video on your phone or on their pc, i get this feeling like im trapped and i have to pretend to enjoy whatever it is, and i dont know how to escape.
2 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
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pretending to like a thing you're shown when you don't is actively self-destructive
you're giving a signal to the person that they're doing something that you like, and they will continue to do it, and they might increase how much they do it

laugh at good shit, shrug at lame shit, but don't fake it
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>>1254
They’re just being hyperbolic.
I feel the pain of having to feign interest. It is good to develop the skill to tell people you’re not interested in something, but I pretty much only do that with people I really like.
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Ah, maybe try suggesting a better video instead so you can both have more fun?
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I feel your pain. It doesn't help that people always make such a big deal out of it. It's not fair.. I have to accommodate everyone's feelings but when they show disapproval towards each other it's totally fine.
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>>1654
painful reality: showing spine after people have grown used to you being a doormat will have them think you suddenly became a bitch
if you meet someone and have always spoken your mind, they will simply be like "ah, ___ has always been that way" and not think too hard about it

as far as I can tell, this is the true form of "nice guys finish last"
it is more like "no one is willing to accept someone seeming to become less nice"

2D Lolikon@Heyuri
Your Windows 11 is ready to install...anon-kun!
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she can watch while i have fun with linux-chan
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843147
If Windows 11 were a person they'd be mega-obese because of all teh bloatware. Representing Windows as a loli just doesn't make sense.

Mint and Ubuntu would be lolis though. Arch and Gentoo would be little tots.
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>>24940
ubuntu would be a niglet loli

Off-Topic@Heyuri
we are fat :ph34r:
we are legion :ph34r:
expect us :ph34r:
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Go grab some! :biggrin:

Off-Topic@Heyuri
ON THE GWEEEEEN!!!!! :glare:
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I refuse to play Golf games. Even the good ones. Unless it's Kirby's Dream Course, which barely counts. :wink:
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I had Jack Nicklaus 4 on PC when I was a kid - good fun ヽ(´ー`)ノ
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キタ━━━(゚∀゚)━━━!!

Off-Topic@Heyuri
Above the entryway to my apartment building is a keystone bearing a strange symbol (but I can't remember what it is). I walk across the lobby's black-and-white checkered tile floor to the elevator, and take it to the top floor - the 33rd. My apartment is decorated in fanciful Art Deco style. The view from the windows is dizzying. No matter where I go in my apartment, I can't seem to escape the feeling of vertigo. I'm so high above everything and through every window I only see twinkling yellow lights far below me, all under a sky of absolute black. I take a stairwell to the roof. There cold gusts of wind nearly knock me off my feet. I can't help but peer over a ledge. Terror. My heart races and I brace myself against a wall. I can hardly stand and stagger back inside.

In the morning I go downstairs and explore the alleyway. Graffiti'd on the weathered orange brick are cryptic glyphs; letters (Hebrew? Enochian?), triangles, squares. A stairway leads to the basement, above its door another keystone bearing another forgotten symbol.
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Off-Topic@Heyuri
girls on toire are moe :nyaoo-closedeyes:
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30 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
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キタ━━━(゚∀゚)━━━!!
>>
All I can hear when I look at these pictures is

*PFOOOOT* *PRRRRTT* *BRAAAP* *PFTT*
*PSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHH*
*PRRRRRRBBFFFFTTTTTT~!*
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2072145
>>175911
All I can hear when I look at these pictures is

Whoosh
drip…
drip…
drip…
drip…
drip
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Post more or I kill myself
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>>176104
Do it, homosexual. 🚾

:sage:

Off-Topic@Heyuri
what fruits have you masturbated with? i've only done it with a banana peel
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3 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
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guess ill have try find a coconut and report back :nyaoo2:
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>>175995
That is what brought upon my question. I love that post.
>>
I posted one time about how I once masturbated with an apple and how it ended up being kinda unpleasant.
Someone recommended me to use a (boiled?) potato rather than an apple, which I still haven't tried
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after learning about herbcides/pesticides i dont want any vegetable near my private parts :sweat3:
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i once masturbated with a slice of salami and then i ate the salami

Off-Topic@Heyuri
it's not too late to change your hikikomori ways.
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17 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
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>>176078
>at the late age of 22, where most people would have already graduated from university!
this hurts me deeply ( ´,_ゝ`)
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it has been a fun 3 years of being lazy but i shall get a job (or try to)
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>>176078
I don't know anyone who got out of uni at 22. Everyone fucking ran late on their degree.
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i haet missing out on teh cytube streams and game days because of work ( ´,_ゝ`)
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28 just kill me now ヽ(`Д´)ノ

Off-Topic@Heyuri
If there any girls on Heyuri that fit the following requirements, please respond to this thread. But first, here's what I have to offer:

1. Financial stability: I make well above average in my country (Located in EU)

2. Age: I am below 25, but above 18.

3. Attractiveness: Aggregate of various AI rating sites: 7.8/10. First person sources: Two girls on twitter said I was "cute"

There. Those are the important details. My "personality"? You can figure that out later :happy:

With that out of the way, here's who I am looking for:

1. Female, Aged 15-25

2. Located in EU

3. Cute
3.1 Not fat
3.2 White and or Asian

4. Willing to let me meet up (and maybe hit it later... jk.... but srsly, we can get to know eachother first. Something long term :wink:)

That's it. I'm not asking for much. I'll take care of you and let you NEET.
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22 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
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>>175869
im sorry, anon. im married, ugly, fat, and have a small PENIS.
>>
Do guys want a dedicated girlfriend? Honestly I feel like I'm too old to get into the dating scene, but sometimes I daydream about just going on dates with a friend ( ´ω`)

Maybe that'd be more like a friend with benefits tho since we wouldn't be building a life together? Idk
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I'm looking for an overly attached girlfriend :blush:
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Do you want big bara men with a giant veiny cock also? If so I will be willing to apply!(⌒∇⌒ゞ)
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>>175921
You first mistake was looking for a girl on heyuri.

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