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File: IMG_5829.jpeg
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54925
No.176034 +
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[Reply]
is this true?
2 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
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No.176041 +
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File: muripo_virgins.jpg
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353912
It's not true, but even a single contact with the female VAGINA will cause her to suck out your wizard powers through your PENIS. And you can't get them back.
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No.176042 +
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File: death grips.jpg
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39491
>>176038
I'm on stage 4.
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No.176053 +
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>>176041
haha wiz-tard p0wers :xd:
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No.176083 +
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>>176041
Does that apply to a man’s rectum?
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No.176098 +
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>>176083
yes, the rectum directly consumes your wizard powers and enriches the presumably male partner
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File: misaki.jpg
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68875
No.175765 +
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[Reply]
it's not too late to change your hikikomori ways.
17 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
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No.176080 +
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>>176078
>at the late age of 22, where most people would have already graduated from university!
this hurts me deeply （ ´,_ゝ`）
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No.176088 +
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it has been a fun 3 years of being lazy but i shall get a job (or try to)
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No.176092 +
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>>176078
I don't know anyone who got out of uni at 22. Everyone fucking ran late on their degree.
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No.176096 +
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i haet missing out on teh cytube streams and game days because of work （ ´,_ゝ`）
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No.176097 +
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File: stalkerChibiOfferingVodka.jpg
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135526
28 just kill me now ヽ(`Д´)ノ
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File: Screenshot (88).png
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71954
No.176095 +
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[Reply]
ON THE GWEEEEEN!!!!! :glare:
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File: 88fa53fc6b71e47cc9d0c9c75a9fc1bf.jpeg
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554203
No.175869 +
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[Reply]
If there any girls on Heyuri that fit the following requirements, please respond to this thread. But first, here's what I have to offer:

1. Financial stability: I make well above average in my country (Located in EU)

2. Age: I am below 25, but above 18.

3. Attractiveness: Aggregate of various AI rating sites: 7.8/10. First person sources: Two girls on twitter said I was "cute"

There. Those are the important details. My "personality"? You can figure that out later :happy:

With that out of the way, here's who I am looking for:

1. Female, Aged 15-25

2. Located in EU

3. Cute
3.1 Not fat
3.2 White and or Asian

4. Willing to let me meet up (and maybe hit it later... jk.... but srsly, we can get to know eachother first. Something long term :wink:)

That's it. I'm not asking for much. I'll take care of you and let you NEET.
21 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
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No.175921 +
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>A-Are there really no boyfriendless girls on Heyuri?
Sure there are - but they're either lesbians or happily single (´ー`)
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No.175923 +
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>>175869
im sorry, anon. im married, ugly, fat, and have a small PENIS.
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No.175926 +
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Do guys want a dedicated girlfriend? Honestly I feel like I'm too old to get into the dating scene, but sometimes I daydream about just going on dates with a friend ( ´ω`)

Maybe that'd be more like a friend with benefits tho since we wouldn't be building a life together? Idk
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No.176089 +
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File: JB Fanvideo [Yh0AhrY9GjA].webm
(18.7 MB, 1440x1080)
19604198
I'm looking for an overly attached girlfriend :blush:
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No.176094 +
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Do you want big bara men with a giant veiny cock also? If so I will be willing to apply!（⌒∇⌒ゞ）
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File: IMG_0864.jpeg
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288611
No.176073 +
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[Reply]
i often forget that most heyurizens are probably grown men instead of cute moe girls (such as myself:nyaoo-closedeyes:)

divided by age and gender, united by being perverted
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No.176074 +
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File: bakudanonigiri.gif
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25362
Pics or it didn't happen. Also, tits or GTFO. :biggrin:
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No.176075 +
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be sure to include timestamp on your tit pic
I'll tribute them tomorrow morning 👍:nyaoo2:
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No.176076 +
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File: 04.png
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1619706
In an ideal world, girls would have the mindset of random Heyurizen guys
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No.176086 +
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vaguaina pls I'm also moe girl I'm not a ojisan ok send now
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No.176090 +
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it sucks being a young guy when you have the mind of a perverted ojisan
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File: ab21c6ec451329677464a6336ea59c87fdcd3cf1.jpeg
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76491
No.176018 +
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[Reply]
Why is she doing this?
5 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
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No.176043 +
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File: The_Whizzard.png
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218567
>>176028
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No.176060 +
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>>176025
Peeing girls are mystery. You will rarely see one in your life. Unless you were lucky in childhood, live in India or China, have a lil imouto living with you, or have a gf.

Btw, I read "Mleczik" as mleczarz / mlékař.
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No.176077 +
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>>176060
dandelion
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No.176082 +
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>>176027
theres always been piss fetishists, its not a recent thing
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No.176087 +
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>>176027
>>176082
it's just scatfags that have been muddying the waters
no pun intended :vomit:
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File: retarded.jpg
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63594
No.176062 +
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[Reply]
if there any retards on heyuri that fit the following requirements, please respond to this thread. but first, here's what I have to offer:

1. money: I make 60 dollars a month

2. age: i can't remember

3. attractiveness: i used to get called cute by obaasans

there. Those are the important details. my "personality"? you can figure that out later.... :dark:

with that out of the way, here's who I am looking for:

1. female, Aged 18-30

2. located in australia (i cant afford plain tickets)

3. kawaii (optional)
3.1 chubby
3.2 any race, i dont give a fuck
3.3 an IQ of 80 to 100
3.4 can cook steak
3.5 uses heyuri.net daily
3.6 knows what a "defense facility" is
3.7 can manage a hakoniwa island
3.8 knows baseball rules

Comment too long, view post No.176062 to see the full comment.
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No.176063 +
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File: yui brain damage.png
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115494
You gave too many requirements for the average retard to even read. :sweat2:
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No.176064 +
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>an IQ of 80 to 100
I'm filtered :worry2:
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No.176066 +
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cooking steak is when you burn it really hard and put ketchup on it right? (´π｀)
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No.176081 +
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I FIT ALL THE REQUIREMENTS! :tongue:

So when are we dating??!?!
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File: single.jpg
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No.176055 +
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[Reply]
Hey Faggots,

My name is John and I'm looking for a girlfriend. If there any girls on Heyuri that fit the following requirements, please respond to this thread. But first, here's what I have to offer:

1. I'm pretty much perfect: I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. I also get straight A's.

2. Age: I am below 25, but above 18.

3. Attractiveness: Aggregate of various AI rating sites: 7.8/10. First person sources: Two banging hot girls on facebook said I was "SO CASH"

There. Those are the important details. My "personality"? You can figure that out later :happy:

With that out of the way, here's who I am looking for:

1. Female, Aged 15-25

2. Located in New Jersey

3. Banging hot
3.1 Not fat
3.2 Not retarded or a no-life

4. Willing to blow me (jk.... but srsly, shit would be SO CASH. Something long term :wink:)

Thanks for listening. I'm not asking for much. I'll take care of you and let you jack off to naked drawn Japanese people. Pic related, it's me by myself.
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No.176059 +
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File: me.png
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92291
hi
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No.176068 +
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File: blushing.jpg
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118637
>>176059
k-k-kawaii!! :blush:
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No.176071 +
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File: lol.jpg
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70402
>>176068
dude, WTF?? is that one of those gay ass chinese cartoon things where they blush super hard after being poked LOL you actually watch that shit??? 😝
lol u never getting laid fag, meanwhile i get mad pussy all the time speaking of which i had sex with ur mom and ur sister shit was soooo cash!!!!! 😘
yeah go jerk off to that while i keep slaying pussy in the bedroom and the streets little bro i just keep staying on top because im on top of ur moms pussy 😏
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File: hawt cp.png
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22052
No.176000 +
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[Reply]
ｷﾀ━━━(´π｀)━━━!!
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No.176009 +
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Remember to wash your hands before coming to Heyuri :xp:
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No.176020 +
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File: failshake.jpg
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45999
ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!
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No.176058 +
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File: handshakeFAIL.png
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55003
This is what actually happens
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File: cute6.jpg
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45202
No.176049 +
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[Reply]
If there anyone on Heyuri that fit the following requirements, please respond to this thread. But first, here's what I have to offer:

1. Financial stability: I make well above average in my country (Located in EU)

2. Age: I am below 22, but above 16.

3. Attractiveness: Aggregate of various AI rating sites: 8.2/10. First person sources: Two catgirls on twitter purred at me

There. Those are the important details. My "personality"? You can figure that out later :happy:

With that out of the way, here's who I am looking for:

1. Any gender, Aged 13-21

2. Located in EU

3. Cute
3.1 Not fat
3.2 Cat and or Doggy

4. Willing to let me rub their belly (and maybe hit it later... jk.... but srsly, we can get to know eachother first. Something long term :wink:)
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No.176051 +
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your minimum age for a cat or dog is 13? Are you running a senior pet daycare or something?
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No.176056 +
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File: fat tub of shit cat.jpg
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373787
>>176049
>3.1 Not fat
DISCRIMINATION! :angry:
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No.176057 +
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arf arf arf arf *pants*
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File: cheesy pizza pockets.jpg
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272824
No.176035 +
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[Reply]
I thought about asking on /q/ because I'm sure the mods would know best, but maybe I'd get b& LOL. :xd: What's the best pocket-based food?
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No.176039 +
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should ask ur mom, since she makes them regularly
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No.176040 +
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>>176039
While I choose to eat hot pockets, I can see why you would resent having to. It sure is nice being able to look away from your screen for more than 30 seconds without worrying if someone is spamming CP. :biggrin:
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No.176054 +
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>>176040
but mods can see deleted posts so they're the only ones that don't have to worry about being late to the pizza party
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File: The-Free-Candy-Van-Creepypasta-780x470.jpg
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59923
No.176016 +
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[Reply]
If there any little girls on Heyuri that fit the following requirements, please respond to this thread. But first, here's what I have to offer:

1. Financial stability: I make well below average in my country (Located in my mother's basement in Alabama)

2. Age: I am below 60, but above 40.

3. Attractiveness: Aggregate of various AI rating sites: 1.9/10. First person sources: Two little girls at the playground screamed and ran away saying I was a "monster"

There. Those are the important details. My "personality"? You can figure that out later :kuma6:

With that out of the way, here's who I am looking for:

1. Female, Aged 4-10

2. Located in USA

3. Cute
3.1 Not fat
3.2 White and or Asian

4. Willing to hop in my van (and maybe hit it later... jk.... but srsly, we can get to know eachother first. Something long term :wink:)
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No.176017 +
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heyuri copypasta :biggrin:
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No.176052 +
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File: 5537LFFFAA4L5EWBKIRTYXVRY7TYWPZC free c(…).jpeg
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97453
Nice try, buddy. :lolico:
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File: Too SWEEEEEEET Scott Hall.mp4
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1014537
No.176045 +
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[Reply]
You can be cool, but you will never be THIS cool. :cool:
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No.176047 +
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SWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET :cool: :cool: :cool:
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File: 63e75e52-e0d6-4cd0-8266-2f9bf5c23030.png
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142465
No.175964 +
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[Reply]
what fruits have you masturbated with? i've only done it with a banana peel
2 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
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No.175997 +
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guess ill have try find a coconut and report back :nyaoo2:
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No.176030 +
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>>175995
That is what brought upon my question. I love that post.
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No.176044 +
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I posted one time about how I once masturbated with an apple and how it ended up being kinda unpleasant.
Someone recommended me to use a (boiled?) potato rather than an apple, which I still haven't tried
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No.176046 +
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after learning about herbcides/pesticides i dont want any vegetable near my private parts :sweat3:
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File: microsoftchan.jpg
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44590
No.176024 +
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[Reply]
how many grams are in an evening spent rotting away infront of a computer?
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No.176026 +
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the question should be how much you GAIN (´ ￢ ` )
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No.176032 +
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File: 1773237444094.jpg
(2.05 MB, 1952x4160)[ImgOps]
2146626
how many grams of dirt, hair, worms, crushed bug parts and fecal matter are smeared on crazy-kun's whiteboard?
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