THE HEYURI MANIFESTO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
IT IS TIME TO LET YOUR INNER PERVERT OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Anyone know a mod that make her shut up?

i just masturbated and WOW! why aren't more people talking about this?

Seriously, stop lying to yourselves: this isn’t even a lazy remaster, it’s an insult. If Nintendo were honestly selling this as a simple HD upscale, I’d be the first to cut them some slack. But to dare call this a "remake"? Don't make me laugh. A real remake modernizes gameplay mechanics and completely overhauls the game, just like Capcom does with Resident Evil or Square Enix with Final Fantasy VII. A remaster is just a fresh coat of paint on the graphics. And even then, the paint here looks pretty washed out. 

Just looking at the latest preview from the Nintendo Direct is a shock... but for all the wrong reasons. The Hyrule Field is still as desperately empty as it was back in 1998. We still have to sit through archaic loading screens just to enter the castle, all that to admire a magnificent static JPEG image in the background. Splendid modernity! As for the villagers in the courtyard, it’s a total joke: they literally look like N64 models slapped with an HD filter. They have zero life in them, with their three ridiculous animations looping endlessly just like back in the day. 

Gameplay-wise, it’s an absolute void. The mechanics haven’t aged a bit: combat drags on, and we’re still stuck with that prehistoric targeting system. So sure, the graphics are a tiny bit more detailed, but that’s the absolute bare minimum for a project of this scale. And despite that, we get competitive-level aliasing! Inside the Great Deku Tree, the spiderweb looks pitifully cheap, and the vines you climb are painful to look at. Don't even get me started on the art direction, which is a total failure: Link looks like a low-cost plastic figurine, trapped in a botched middle ground between semi-realism and cartoonish design. 

For a supposed "remake," logic dictates that they should have expanded the indoor and outdoor areas. We should have gotten a world that was both more modern and less linear—a sort of sublimated Twilight Princess or an open world inspired by Breath of the Wild, while still preserving the DNA, the iconic art direction, and the structure of old Zelda games, but finally full of life. 

But go ahead, keep pre-ordering with your eyes closed and calling it a masterpiece. It’s precisely because of docile, easily pleased gamers like you that the video game industry is dead. Grow up a little.

As a massive fan of old-school Nintendo especially Zelda OOT and Twilight Princess (honestly, I couldn't care less about Mario) this upcoming "remake" is an absolute scam. I refuse to

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is your skin paler than this cat?

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This coming Saturday we will be streaming a double feature on heyuri cytube, starting at 1800 UTC. First will be Shirome (2010) followed by Safe Word (2022). Both are directed by Shiraishi Koji both with an idol torture theme.
Shirome is a documentary style film where idol group Momoiro Kuroba Z is sent on what they believe is a paranormal variety show to investigate a haunted school. Safe World is a BDSM lesbian idol wrestling film and thats all ill say there. come join!!!!!!!

If you had a daughter, would you do Twitch streams with her?

I played this game for 1 hour in the pc of my work and this sucks. Nothing interesting happened, I only lose my time playing this, I thought that I will have to deal with the haters everytime and she will start to going crazy if I don’t deal right, I saw a lot of images showing creepy shit, but it’s just click, click and repeat

I swear by God and by the virgin mary that this is true, it just happened:

I've been waiting for the perfect time to act this out. Me and my sister have been sent to live with our grandparents for a period of time, and thankfully they are both senile so we've just been doing whatever we want. I'm over 18 (so i can post here stfu) but I still dont have a car or anything so I am stuck in this house with them.

I've spent most of my time on my laptop or phone, but my little sister is only just entering her teen years and is a very outdoorsy person, so she's been running around and tiring herself out in the wilderness near my granddparents home. I haven't ever slept in the same room as her, and now I can see she's a very heavy sleeper, especially when she's worn out.

I tested the waters the other day by poking her, saying her name, and shaking her arm a little bit. Nothing. fast asleep. So I tried licking my fingers and placing them on her chest to see if she'd wake up because of the cold wetness. No.

So I got the bravery to do what I've wanted to do for a long time: I kissed her. I quickly slinked back to my bed to see if she'd wake up... but she didn't. So I got my PENIS out and touched the head to her lips... that alone was enough to make me want to cum, so I masturbated while kissing her every few moments. It was the best fap of my entire life.

Now I'm back in bed writing this. It's almost 1am here. She's still fast asleep. My sister kissed the head of my PENIS and she doesn't even know it. I feel euphoric

Anyone got link to teh heyuri chatroom? IRC is kinda dead

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