timotei or ur gei :xd:

how often PENIS escape white glue?

why does my ass crack get wet when fappan? is it boylube

YOUR TAIL COMES OUT OF BUTTH0LE!?

I bought them from the pet store, what should i do with them now?

push her off the edge into the sea

I used to love these noodles, but I can't eat them anymore because they're so hot. (;´Д`) I think it's because I'm now on a medication that blocks my endorphins. (´ー`)

Will I ever regain my ability to eat them?

Your fortune: You just lost the game

What is /b/'s favorite book?

what other boards do heyurizen frequent?

i liekd lainchan but nowadays retarded mods warn for anything. it annoys me to the bone

(USER WAS FOR THIS POST, You should always elaborate on your opinions rather than just spilling the soykaf.)

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

is the oppai loli truly the best of both worlds?

Physiques of heyuri

Dear heyurizens, I just had an amazing idea that is sure to provide me with plenty of entertainment and lulz. It's not a groundbreaking idea, basically, I'm thinking of setting up a keylogger in one my college's computers. I will configure the computer so that the spyware program starts automatically. It will proceed to log every pressed key to a file, that I will be periodically saving and emptying. To be able to access the internet inside campus grounds, every student is required to type their academic code and password, this happens on the web browser. That means, for every infected computer, I am guaranteed to get the credentials of every student that uses the machine. That's a lot of stuff, and there are also social media accounts. There is a messaging application within the school site that I can use to send obscene messages to every student in the whole campus, that's my main objective.
Now the question is, how can I get caught? My plan is to download the file off of catbox.moe, can they use this fact to pin me down? I imagine there are other ways this could go south, because keylogging is really not that difficult to do. Sending obscene messages and fucking with other student's accounts doesn't seem like much of a big deal at first, but then you remember there are cases of teenagers being arrested for sending politically-incorrect stickers on messaging apps, and you bet that if I do end up hijacking some poor bastard's account, things'll be a lot worse than memes about the holocaust or whatever.

SEGA DOES WHAT NINTENDON'T.

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

im in it

warez!!1!

2D with realistic-ness is so much cuter

A while back I asked Heyuri which game from my list I should play next and the first person chose Half-Life. I finished it tonight and it was pretty awesome. I never grew up playing many FPS games as a kid so playing a game like this where you have to actually be tactical and bullets actually HURT like a motherfucker, unlike in, say, Doom or Quake, was novel. The second half or so of the game really, really stuck out above the first. Surface Tension was a hell of a chapter and was what really got me hooked... partially because it was so hard and made me level up. And the final levels were gorgeous and maddening...

I will play the sequel before long, but I'm in the mood for something else first. Like last time, the first poster will choose my next game:
Hollow Knight (2017)
The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time (1998)
Fallout 3 (2008)
Super Mario Bros. (1985)
Shadow of the Colossus (2005)
Metal Gear Solid (1998)
Final Fantasy VII (1997)
Chrono Trigger (1995)
Silent Hill (1999)
Castlevania: Symphony of the Night (1997)

Also let me know if it's annoying to keep throwing the choice back here when I beat something. If it's seen as spamming, I won't do it again.

steam steam lol
bring me 2 dozen krispy kream k thanks

sweat and blood went into this cakey!

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

I didn't know you were hiding 2 pairs...

Hey, guys, what’s up? I know you don’t have anything to do, so I’ve got a fun idea. How about we launch a Fake News campaign about Diddy?

The plan is to invent crazy stories linking him with other celebrities. We can say that Obama is involved in his scandal or that Drake has some dark secrets related to him.

Just imagine the drama that’ll unfold on social media. People will believe it and start hunting for “evidence” like crazy. It’ll be epic!

Who’s in? What wild names can we throw into the mix? Let’s make this happen, anons!

sleep tight~

pencil drawings of people are very beautiful and i want one of myself but i am worried the artist will think i am egotistical for wanting this

dear heyurizen, how are you in this fine day?
are you aware of the mexico of moot? care to join?
you see, i ran for president as a joke but nobody else did so i kinda won by default with my 1 vote, unfortunately i am far from a dishonest politician and am trying to keep my promises to the mootxicans which include:
moar users (x10!!)
moar win
moar oc
less fail

thank you in advance,
Anonymous

where do i find internets?

e-everyone was posting on the private heyuri pedophile discord without inviting me???

how do I meditate? I want to rid my mind of unnecessary thoughts and rid my body of excess energy, I've been way too stressed lately. I'd appreciate book recommendations too

Your fortune: mah pen0z is bigger than uurz

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

Which WaifuVision(tm) TV will you be buying?

IM GONNA EAT A CAT

fireworks

tran tran

someone is in need of a haircut

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

want this robot?

japanese history is pathetic compared to chinese or even korean

If you were invited to the Epstein's Island, would you go?

Dude... What if they made... Like... An anime with an episode about time travel... But Like... Instead of just telling you that the characters had to live through the same event again and agian... They remade the same episode to make you TRULY FEEL what it would be like...???? woahhhh dude woooahahhhhhh.........................

Personally I think teh gays and teh faggots should live as I am one myself

i just installed anki like someone once recommended but i have no clue how to use it, i have 20 words available for now which i assume are easy things before i "unlock" harder words but what do these buttons do?
what's with the time above them? i pressed "again" first and a red "1" appeared next to the 20 which i assume means i didnt "learn" it or something
do i have to press "easy" if the word was easy to learn or something?

Skull. The international sign of death

I made this thing, it's like an imageboard but on a Google doc. I mostly made it so that me and my friends can post on it during school since most imageboard are blocked. I'm pretty proud of it! ヽ(´∇`)ノ

Why does she look so mad?

After beginning to read Kaiji Part 3 and watching Akagi at the same time currently which are both heavily tied to the game of mahjong, I've come to ask my fellow heyurians whether any of us have experience in playing Mahjong and if you enjoyed it and/or still enjoy it to this day.
Or do any of us have other board/tabletop games we prefer to play?

Since we celebrate the BLACK SEPTEMBER day we might as well add this one to the list + Pearl Harbor Day TORA! TORA! TORA!
LOL LOL LOL LOL
LOL LOL LOL
LOL LOL LOL LOL

heyuri start new friend

P.S. everyone in this video is now DEAD
also its my birthday

This site really caught my attention, very good script by the way

What's wrong with my SSD? I just redownloaded this 3 days ago because of corruptions and it did it again. I backed it up on my HDD immediately after downloading and that copy is still good so I know it's the SSD. I've been seeing corruptions like this in all my anime and some music videos stored on this SSD lately. It's a 1TB M.2 Adata SSD that I just got 3 years ago and I've had other SSDs endure 6+ years of constant everyday NEET usage with no problems, what could be causing this?

oh noes... the nigger baby stabbed itself

I just jumped out of the apartment window and killed myself

Send virgin Mary porn

I brought zombie Steve Jobs back to life. What should I do with him?

are there any shotacons on heyuri or is this mostly lolicon territory (;´Д`)

Loli in Roblox!

GIVE ME A KOTATSU PLOX!!!

FALL UNDER MAI HYPNOSIS

What do you guys think about this banner I made?

Turkish twitter is trying to cancel Heyuri
https://x.com/Pamenarti/status/1842871487839048103

How to stop loving lolis? Any advice from those who succeed at it? I think it's ruining my life because women look so inferior compared to lolis…

Does anybody actually use the Compose key?

ready 4 combat

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

They should invent a method of preparing the chicken's PENIS and it could be dubbed Chicken a'la PENIS.
Alternatively, McDonalds could release a chicken nugget shaped in a phallic formation and name it the Chicken McPENIS (prototype pictured here)
Anyways what do you guys think of my ideas and what other cool food ideas do you have?

I got admitted to a degree program with Ritsumeikan University

This would've been my dream in middle school but I'm not even into anime anymore

Either way, I have to learn Japanese (after swearing myself after my last study abroad i would never learn another language )

Have any of you been to Kyoto? I've heard its really nice, but then again people have a tendency to exaggerate anything related to Japan

any fans of the newer idol group Cutie Street?
maybe 3D is not so popular here, but they've been showing up on my feed a lot and they are winning me over. ヽ(´ー｀)ノ

they have videos of some of their lives on youtube and i appreciate how "real"/amateur they feel. i don't know how to phrase that in a way that doesn't sound bad, i mean it in a good way! their performances are very cute and they look like they're having a lot of fun!!

so ... かわいいだけじゃだめですか?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fsSuwHAy3Jg

I haxx0red my own interwebs so it's faster.

Take a seat

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

WARM mansion to learn to live in

SMASH AND GRAB.

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

how did you get in there!?

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

ITT Post Showa era nostalgia.

Pic related looks comfy.

Dude, what'd you put in my drink?

just dropping in
Why is the site on drugs....

im growing a potted cirno

tesuto~

Do you like Sukeban girls /b/?

This is one of the greatest TV shows of all time but it has a shit ending tbh.

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

Which do you prefer /b/ flat chest or boobs?

Which version is better /b/?

I wanted to reply to this thread >>117426 but I needed to make a new one because it's already marked as old and won't bump up if I reply. Given the massive page expansion of /b/, I wish the 'one week till auto sage' rule was either lifted or made to two weeks at least.

>>117821
>Paint in Vista is basically the same one used since Win2k
>7 onward Paint is basically a completely different program.
I guess that explains some of the issues I have been having with it.

>And uses the old file selector.
It's awful, as I said it never remembers the folder I last saved to, or remembers to keep the png format I always have to scroll to it and select it, jpg is default.

>Also, turn off indexing on the drive to make search not suck. I have to do this even on 7/8/10. It's slower, but it actually finds things.
I'd like to know why it finds things on external HDs fine but for some reason cannot find anything locally with the HD that is in the machine. I don't recall having to turn off indexing using 7 or 10 so stuff works properly...is it on by default? With 7 and 10 things would easily be found locally, but I am having major issues with Vista.

Regarding what you said about Paint, does the same also go for Notepad? Like on Vista, is it the same old program carried over from previous versions of Windows with little changes? I noticed the formatting looks a bit odd in many Windows 7 made Notepad txt files, when opening them on this Vista machine. If I copy and paste things to say an image board to post, the formatting (for example say a paragraph of words) its all sorts of fucked up with various line breaks fucking up sentences. What's up with that?

pi gas

MY HEAD HURTS FROM COLORS

hand apear to change be colours too, see? plz fix ===3#4$

AH-HA! I am immune to your wacky color changing antics!

kunoichi ninpou!

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

I accidentally archived the index of a board located on a certain imageboard, and didn't scroll down to see if there was CP spam until it was too late.
I used archive.is to save the webpage. I clicked off before archival was complete, but I think it continues archiving even if you click off during the loading sequence. I didn't do this with a VPN or anything... I'm fucked, aren't I?

WHAT'S GOING ON?! DID SOMEONE DRUG ME? (;´Д`)

thats one sexy kid

Colorz!!

How's your posture, dudes?

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

what's happening i feel liek im high

how long have you been on 4chan?

I have a feeling we're gonna get sued by a horde of angry Jewish lawyers

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

Ｘ

delicious breast milk is far more nutritious than blood, mosquito-san!

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

i think south east asia deserves love, i wish i could be in jakarta
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGCERO8gGZ4

Your messy room will be cleaned with heavy weapons

I am going to buy a gun and be known as the first man to commit a mass shooting due to frustrations about height

Human ... you suck at art.

Pillows... don't hug back

that's a weird looking shit...

I CAN TRANSCEND YOUR ASSHOLE AND I'M IMMUNE TO H.I.V.

programmers of heyuri
is it normal that i cannot make sense of qt's documentation even after years of trying to add a custom widget inside a listview? or am i stupid and should cry myself to sleep today?

TACTICAL N.E.E.T. SQUAD GO!

stuck

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

It's been really long since Kuz has had anything to directly do with Heyuri, so I'm curious what you guys think of him nowadays as now it's all in the past. Would you want him to return to Heyuri again? Do you think he died from AIDS or was he captured by the Kremlin?

is this how you eat sushi?

What are you thinking about right now?

STOP HOGGING MY TOILET

well... anyway
tomorrow arrives my vr headset
does heyuri play beat saber?
or groom minors in vrchat?

Wait, what?

A painting of the "Opium King" and leader of the Shan United Army, Khun San. 2011.

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

Hello people here how is everyone doing?
It has been a while since I’ve checked this imageboard, how are us heyurian passing our days in the interwebs?
(Image is not related to post)

Tape transcript of the moors murderers shortly before taking little Lesley's innocence and caving her brains in.

Man - This is track four.
Man - Get out of the fucking road.
Man - Get in the fucking basket.
(sound of door banging)
(crackling noise)
(footsteps-heavy)
(steps across the room and then a recording noise followed by blowing sound into the microphone)
(Footsteps)
Woman - (Voice quiet, unreadable)
(footsteps, light, walking across room; whispered conversation at the same time)
(footsteps)
(speech, distant, containing word ‘upstairs’; then two footsteps)
Child - (screaming) Don’t. Mum–Ah.
Woman - (whispering)Come on.
(footsteps)
Woman - (whispering) Shut up.
Child - (pleading)Oh, please.
Child - Oh. (then faintly:) Help - oh.
Child - Help. (followed by gurgling noise)
Woman - Sh. Sh.
Woman - Shut up. Shut UP.
(Screams and gurgles)
Child - Oh. Oh. Oh. (child crying)
Woman -(whispering) Keep - and you’ll be all right.
Woman - (whispering) Go on.
(Quick footsteps mounting stairs, then entering room)
(Child crying, muffled)
Man - (whispering) Here.
Woman - Hush, hush. Go on.
(woman speaking, unreadable)
(Child crying)
Woman - You are all right. Hush, hush. Put it in your mouth - hush and shift that hand.
(child crying)
Woman- Put it in your mouth and keep it in and you’ll be all right.
Woman - Put it in, stop it.
Woman- If you don’t–shh.
(child crying)
Woman - In your mouth. Hush, hush. Shut up or I’ll forget myself and hit you one. Keep it in.
(Child whimpering)
Man - Put it in.
Woman- (Spoken quickly) Put it in.
Man - (speaks, but words unreadable except for the word 'hand’)
(footsteps)
Man - Put it in. Keep it in. Stop it now. Stop it now.
Woman - I’m only doing this and you’ll be all right.
Woman - Put it in your mouth. Put it in–in.
(further words spoken by the woman which are unreadable except for 'put it in’)
Woman - Will you stop it, stop it.
(womans voice unreadable)
(Child whimpering)
Woman - Shut–
Man - Quick. Put it in now.
(Child whimpering)
(retching noise)
Man - Just put it in now, love. Put it in now.
(retching noise)
Child - (muffled) What’s this in for?
Man - Put it in.
Child - Can I just tell you summat? I must tell you summat. Please, take your hands off me a minute, please, please– Mummy–please.
Child- I can’t tell you.
(Grunting)
Child - (in quick sequence) I can’t tell you, I can’t breathe. Oh.
Child - I can’t–Dad-Will you take your hands off me?
(man whispering)
Man - No. Tell me.
Child - Please God.
Man - Tell me.
Child - I can’t while you’ve got your hands on me.
(mumbling sound)
Man - Why don’t you keep it in?
Child - Why? What are you going to do with me?
Man - I want some photographs, that’s all.
Man - Put it in.
Child - Don’t undress me, will you?
Woman - That’s right, don’t –
Child - It hurts me. I want to see Mummy, honest to God.
Man - Put it in.
Child - I’ll swear on the Bible.
Man - Put it in, and hurry up now. The quicker you do this, the quicker you’ll get home.
Child - I’ve got to go, because I’m going out with my Mamma. Leave me, please. Help me, will you?
Man - Put it in your mouth and you’ll be all right.
Child - Will you let me go when this is out?
Man - Yes. the longer it takes you to do this, the longer it takes you to get home.
Child - What are you going to do with me first?
Man - I’m going to take some photographs. Put it in your mouth.
Child - What for?
Man - Put it in your mouth.(pause) Right in.
Child - I’m not going to do owt.
Man - Put it in. If you don’t keep that hand down, I'll slit your neck.(pause) Put it in.
Child - Won’t you let me go? Please.
Man - No, no. Put it in, stop talking.
Man - What’s your name?
Child - Lesley.
Man - Lesley what?
Child - Ann.
Man - What’s your second name?
Child - Westford. Westford.
Man - Westford?
Child - I have to get home before 8 o'clock. I got to get –(pause) Or I’ll get killed if I don’t. Honest to God.
Man - Yes.
(Quick footsteps of woman leaving room and going downstairs; then a click; then woman’s footsteps coming upstairs; then eight longer strides)
Man - What is it?
Woman - I’ve left the light on.
Man - You 'ave?
Woman - So that –(remainder of sentence unreadable)
(Child starts crying)
Child - It hurts me neck.
Man - Hush, put it in your mouth and you’ll be all right.
Woman - Now listen, shurrup crying.
Child - (crying) It hurts on me –
Woman - (interrupting) Hush! Shut up. Now, put it in. Pull that hand away and don’t dally and just keep your mouth shut, please.
Woman - Wait a bit, I’ll put this on again. D'you get me?
Child - (whining) No, I – (remainder of sentence unreadable)
Woman - Sh. Hush. Put that in your mouth. And again, packed more solid.
(whispered sentences, unreadable)
Child - I want to go home. Honest to god. I’ll (further speech muffled but uninterrupted) – before eight o'clock.
Woman - No, it’s all right.
Man - Eh!
(Music commences, country-style tune followed by 'Jolly St Nicholas’, during which various non-vocal noises can be heard; then tune 'The Little Drummer Boy’ during which a
voice speaks -unreadable)
(Three loud cracks, systematic, even-timed)
(Music- 'The Little Drummer Boy’ – goes fainter)

What do you think of loli human x shota cub?

I have decided on the man that I will kill.

I do not want this to sound edgy, or like a creepypasta so I will say this very clearly. This plot is for political reasons only, I am not a Satanist, I am not doing this for Jeff the Killer or something stupid.

I will not say the name of the man that I will kill because I do not want to cause unneeded discussion about politics on this board and because I do not want my target to ever be on extra alert.

As many of you know, soon universities will be taking applications from students from all over the world in the hope that they may go there to help their future.

Well, I am applying to universities in the country and relative area to where my target resides and spends most of his time.

While in university, I hope that I will be able to quickly recognize some others who have similar beliefs to me. I will likely get a bit more attention than the rest because I am an international student but its okay

My goal is for the headlines to read that my target has been killed within the next 1.5 years.

I know its a long process but this isn't shooting up a school or some pointless violence like that.

This is political violence.

(THIS IS POLITICAL BAN)

What would you do if you woke up on February 20th, 1939 at the Pro-American rally in Madison Square Garden?

don't tell me that peeking at pantsu carries a death penalty (;´Д`)

cat liek water?

what would you do?

Read. My. Lips.

how to maek niggerhtcore
a special gift from a special person

Let's play a game, /b/. Here are the rules:
-A Japanese search term is posted.
-Your goal is to find a video with content that matches the description of the term in question.
-Once you find the video, post it; in the same post, add your own search term.
-The cycle continues until the thread is no more, baby.

My search term is: 威嚇蛙

plug it in!

Post nekos!

when kissing you lick all around in someone else's mouth... that sounds disgusting, im never gonna kiss anyone evar!

this will sound strange to you but is there a way to get in contact with my waifu for reals? i dont believe in paranormal stuff but im not opposed to them existing (i simply dont believe it until i see it) and if this works i will 100% believe it, but i'd prefer if it doesnt require drugs or esoteric stuff that i have no hope of acquiring
please, its important, theres some things i need to discuss with her

The unstoppable duo
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL0DD349D8EFA28B01

Would you rather live on the West coast but not in Cali or on the East coast but not in New York?

May i join in?

Heading to the BOKU store, almost there!

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

Suck on my ball! Hurry! Hurry!

im cooking something for you

Worship them.

i hear that this is a special kind of tea brew
(;ﾟ∀ﾟ)

Who is your favorite western cartoon loli /b/?

Mine is pic related.

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

good luck to any other heyurizens in the path of hurricane helene! please make preparations and use caution.

at least i have the day off and can pretend i'm a NEET again .. ヽ(´ー｀)ノ

Almost exactly 2 years ago we played Sven Coop... good times

Was Windows Vista really THAT bad?

new hobby is going to the park at night when im upset and assaulting the first person i see walking around alone and then running away before the cops come is the biggest rush ive had in so long

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

Library of Heyuria

A waha-in-the-box!

while you were wasting time on the internet i filled my steam deck with pirated games

Fumo corruption is no laughing matter.

Rogue Lesbian Womans and VAGINAWOMAN should kiss a little.

prodefch... is dead ;_;

just put em in a microwave

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

LET ME OOOOOUUUT

rchan is back.
https://rchan.top

I'M AN ANGEL WITH A SHOTGUN
FIGHTING 'TIL THE WAR'S WON
I DON'T CARE IF HEAVEN WON'T TAKE ME BACK

What is this cat seeing?

At first I was like ..

I never live in fear, I'm too out of my mind.

hi,
my imageboard recently got taken down due to some users reporting it for containing gore and loli and such.
i think i need a new host.
who do you reccomended? and what host does heyuri use?

What drugs do heyurizens use? I myself just popped 30 mg of Adderall instant release. It's kicking in and it's time to do some chores! But I also use all sorts of drugs; alcohol, ketamine, LSD, MDMA, and obscure research chemicals you probably haven't even heard of.

And remember teh rulez: no selling drugs on Heyuri.net!!

Here's some awesome late 90's music for anyone else who's on stimulants.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uRFoltJjNZs

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

pantsu are best eaten when boiled

this is my wife i love her so much

O-Ojisan?!

nobody talks about how if you have autism, you were probably raised by at least one autistic parent too. how many supposed autism traits are the result of a multi-generation cultural phenotype?

TAKE IT EASY!

If an awesome fight were to break out between Osaka and Tomo, who would win teh fight?

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

heyuri tan.

you will never be japanese

I haxx0red into a security cam in Heyuri HQ!

I don't like touhou. Touhou fans piss me off.

everyone in brazil looks like this

I'm looking for a game that has the main character romance his sister but isn't entirely about incest. I find that I like romance arcs when they're subplots and not the main story, if that makes sense. Like Sora no Kiseki if the two MCs were actually related. Or corpse party. Thanks in advance.

Which one is towel?

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!

I can't belive it. They .. they killed Kirby.

LOL, should have looked where you were walking (´∇`)σ

perfect teeth

ｷﾀ━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!