Do you ever think about what you really care about? Not what people around you expect you to want, but what you yourself consider the most important thing to you.

Sometimes I talk about this with my friend, about how a lot of humans (men, women and children) expect other humans to act and behave in a certain way, and will relentlessly mock and tear them down (verbally, sometimes violently) if they do not conform to their mental model. Easy examples I can think of are how women are expected to marry and have children, men are expected to behave "in ways that attract women", and how individuals are expected to act in the interest of the many over the few. I can understand the reasons why this is so prevalent everywhere, but it still saddens me that this is the state of everything.

In my case, I like looking pretty and girly (note there is a slight distinction between pretty and sexy, and girly and womanly). I have seen people get told off for "acting childish/immature". Admittedly, I have not experienced being made fun of for wanting to look a certain way, but I would not be surprised if it has happened before. Especially with the idea of "aesthetics" and "-cores" being currently popular online, and how I have seen people change their behavior and interests just to "fit in" to certain subcultures.

This felt like a rant, but I just wanted to write things down. I have thought about whether I want to be enslaved to the thoughts and desires of the people who hate and want to destroy everything I hold dear, and even whether I actually want to live in the community they want to build. So far my answer has been "No", but I hope there never comes a time where that gets tested.