Greetings,
I write this letter today to inform you that there have been some issues with the shipping of your package (11 inch dildo): unfortunately our driver was caught posting greentext and throwing his own feces at Kaguya's house and has, therefore, been arrested. Unfortunately your package will be delayed, but we guarantee that it will be shipped to your abode within 5 business days, we sincerely apologize for the inconvenience

Regards,
Heyuri Shipping Service